12.02.2009

Boyd Bailey: A Sensitive Husband…

“Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.” Matthew 1:19

Men in general and husbands in particular can lack sensitivity, unless the Holy Spirit tames them with truth. A husband can be so caught up in winning that he loses the respect of his wife. Husbands have to work at being sensitive, while it seems to come more naturally for their wives. However, husbands who are sensitive to God learn sensitivity with their spouse. When the Holy Spirit harnesses a man’s heart, sensitivity accompanies his actions.

Does sensitivity mean a passive and weak husband? On the contrary, it frees a man to hear from God and administer grace to his wife and children. “Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms” (1 Peter 4:10). Sensitivity means a husband prays for his wife, he listens to her heart, offers gentle advice, values who’s she is and he encourages her with patient love.

A sensitive husband loves his wife in an understanding way. “In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together” (1 Peter 3:7a NLT). A husband who walks in humility is a life long student of how to love his bride. He understands that her needs change with each season of life, and he is able to apply his understanding love at her point of need.

Therefore, husbands speak privately to your wife with sensitivity and grace. Never publically disgrace or embarrass her. Learn from her the art of sensitive living. Moreover, wives trust the Lord to mold your husband into being a godly man. Win them over with character not craftiness; “Your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives” (1 Peter 3:1b NLT).

Practice the presence of God in everyday life and you will become sensitized by the Holy Spirit’s calming affect. It is that gentle work of the Spirit in your soul that grows gentle giants for God. Sensitivity is strength not weakness, wisdom not foolishness, humility not pride and love not judgment. Sensitive souls seek God first before they react in anger.

Listen to Jesus respond to a hard heart with a sensitive spirit, “Jesus looked at him and loved him. "One thing you lack," he said. "Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me” (Mark 10:21).

How can I love and lead my wife with sensitivity and love? How can I model for my husband what it looks like to be sensitive, and to love in an understanding way?

Related Readings: Genesis 19:14; Deuteronomy 20:7; 1 Corinthians 7:36; Hebrews 13:4

Source: Wisdom Hunters by Boyd Bailey

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